you can fill in the blanks as you wish. on to today!
5:30. alarm went off. i turned it off and crawled right back into and under the warm blankets.
6:30. woke up to the fresh smell of monday morning regret. okay, so i'm being a little hard on myself... the weekend wasn't all that bad. i just took on way too much and tried to accomplish way too many things, which left me with little-to-no room for rest, working out or making any other wise decisions with regards to my self-care. i think i used to be an extrovert, but ever since having kids, i kind of just want to be left alone.
but then every few months i look around at my lack of friends and wonder why i'm kind of lonely... i do not know how my other mama friends have time for play dates and friendships and book clubs and other crap. i just want to sleep most of the time or be by myself. and when i do over-extend myself and do too much in one weekend, i'm so exhausted that it takes me days to recover. hence the sleeping in of this morning.
when i was working out consistently during round 1, i wasn't so tired all the time. in fact, i had more energy. noted.
7:30. this is a picture of me finding a way to throw food in my face on the way out the door and pack some semblance of a lunch. it was completely thrilling!
|no it wasn't.|
i got to work around 8:30 and immediately got busy with work things. good thing they pay me! whoo-boy!
10:30. smoothie time. half a frozen banana, protein/greens powder, frozen beet greens (i know, right?! yum.) almond milk, ice and peanut butter.
1:30. i wasn't very hungry, but i figured i should eat some of the food that i took the time to pack for myself.
|greek yogurt. strawberries and blueberries. muesli.|
3:30. the badger and the children picked me up so we could drop him off for his annual physical and i took children home so i could play "mom." i had the kids help me make chili for dinner. it's a combination of a turkey chili and a meaty IPA chili, both recipes that i love. but i didn't have the complete ingredients for either recipe so i kind of made my own thing and let the kids watch while i added a little bit more of "this" and "that" to the pot of chili and they protested "but that's not in the recipe!?!!" ah, children.
we also made this cornbread recipe, which my friend angie brought to us last fall when john was so sick from his head injury and i was either hungover or crying most of the time. i remember this cornbread being so delicious, moist and creamy that it almost made me weep. i wept because i was hungry. i wept because i was sad and scared. i wept because i've never been able to make a moist cornbread, ever. i wept because a friend cared enough to make something totally delicious for us to nourish our bodies and souls during such a dark time. this recipe reminds me of the generous outpouring of love and support we received last fall from so many people when things were so dark for our family. just seeing this recipe reminds me of that love that was dumped all over us when we so needed it. and then i think about how it really is better to live in community and put in the effort towards friendship, because there will come a time, inevitably, that you need each other.
so i guess i should keep working out so i have the energy for such things (see above).
it is now 8:00 and i am winding down for the evening. and you noticed correctly - i did not get a workout in today. i'm planning to get up for a run tomorrow morning if my knees cooperate. they're still kind of giving me the business from that run last week. or maybe it's the change in weather? maybe i'm so old that my knees are now my own personal weather.gov?
either way, until tomorrow,
ashley "if crazy made sense, they wouldn't call it crazy" rebekah