it all starts here.

the story behind this blog is two-, maybe three-, fold. the first is how i met and fell in love with the man who is now my husband (affectionately referred to as "the badger"). the second is my love affair with cooking and baking, reading foodie blogs and cookbooks, eating, baking, kneading dough and eating all over again. the third is how i fell back in love with running after a 2 year hiatus.

let's start at the beginning as i cleverly weave my way into combining my love for the badger with my love of food and my penchant for running.

amidst the twists and turmoil of adult dating, one often can and does turn to the assistance of friends and family to help them find that special someone. or, in my case, you order someone directly out of a catalog (read: online dating service). i don't know why i waited so long (ahem, 31 to be exact) to go the route of internet dating. perhaps we can attribute my avoidance of seeking the assistance of an online dating service to my taurus nature and stubborn pride. but after fifteen years of an exhausting dating career with one failed relationship and heartbreak after another, culminating in a surprise pregnancy and a devastating twenty-two month-long relationship, i decided to go the way of online dating. i decided that maybe, quite frankly, i didn't know what the hell i was looking for or needed in a man... but someone else might.

and i simply have to say: it was the best thing i ever did. i didn't have to go through months (sometimes, sadly, years) of heartbreak to weed out the narcissists, liars, cheaters, mama's boys or agoraphobics. the online dating service that i chose did that all for me! all i had to do was be honest about who i really was and they replied with "great! we've got just the guy for you..."

<enter the badger, stage right...>

my profile on the dating site stated, among other things (like the fact that I had four-month old twins in tow for dates), my affinity for cooking and, especially, my love affair with kneading dough and making pies. the badger's opening email to me said something along the lines of "so, you like to make pies? funny. because i love to eat them! blueberry, strawberry, rhubarb, peach, banana creme, apple, pumpkin..."

i was hooked. so was he. our first date in the spring of 2010 was one of those picturesque encounters over candlelight, wine, dishes of olives, plates of stinky cheese and baskets of warm bread. he gave me a lily allen cd. i made him a cherry pie. and we have been nearly inseparable ever since.

the badger and my love affair for cooking have intersected on a regular basis as i have sliced and diced my way through my kitchen, straight into his heart. there is nothing in the world like watching someone you love devour something you have made from the work of your own hands and the scratch of your own recipes.

oh, but the problem with having a love affair with cooking and eating, especially when combined with a healthy dose of post-partum trauma and depression, is that the pounds sure do find a way to hang on. in my younger, pre-pregnancy years, i loved running. it was how i managed stress, how i managed to fit into size 6 jeans at 5’11”, and how i found time alone to get to know myself. being a pseudo-extrovert, time alone is a welcomed and cherished thing and running gave that to me. but the pregnancy and post-partum turmoil that followed the birth of my twins, nashota dale and ezekiel william (referred to herein as 'nash' and 'zeke'), meant that i simply didn’t have it in me to run. raising twins it tough. raising twins as a single mom is even tougher. sticking with an exercise regimen was last on my list of “how to survive as a single mama to twins” list.

but as i have navigated these early years of being a mom, i am seeing more and more that the fog of depression and sadness is easily lifted by simply changing my habits (moving more and eating real food), and this makes me a better mom and a better human in the world.

so this is my blog about changing my habits, once choice at a time.

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