21 day fix. day 18. snooze.

snooze. it's what i'd like to do for a whole, entire day. that's right. i want to black out my bedroom windows and just sleep for approximately 18 hours. i don't feel that this is too much to ask. in a similar vein, i'd like someone to take our asshole of a dog for those 18 hours, since he has decided to pace the room, pant and whine all night long for the past two nights. my children finally start sleeping through the night and now a four-legged-creature with fur and no thumbs is gonna keep me up? f*ck that.

here's the problem with having a dog before you have kids. the dog spends their entire existence pre-baby (or babies) thinking they are #1. but then you have a baby (or babies) and they are quickly dethroned to last on the list of priorities in the household. do i love levi? yes. of course i do. do i give a sh*t when he whimpers at me in the middle of the night? no. not really. i have limited emotional and physical reserves. levi gets approximately 3% of them, which i feel is his fair share.

so why is levi pacing, panting and whimpering in the night? you guessed it. he got into the kitchen garbage about two days ago and has been doing all kinds of despicables ever since. no, he didn't get into anything that's going to kill him. it's just general stupid dog digestive problems. he's always had a funny tummy, and it's even funnier (not really funny at all) when he eats anything weird. dogs are so dumb. they know when they get into the garbage that a) their people are going to be super pissed off at them, and b) they're probably gonna get super ill. and they do it anyway.

on to today.

5:30. alarm goes off. given that i was out in the backyard two times during the night with levi, i did not workout this morning. i slept.

7:00. i decided i had to get up if i wanted to remain gainfully employed. i got into a cold shower and almost fell asleep standing up. do you hear me? naked. ice cold water. standing up. almost fell asleep.

7:30. i made breakfast not only for myself, but for the badger as well! i made him the exact same plate that i made for myself and said "go ahead! tell me how awesome you feel after eating this!!!" he wasn't nearly as excited as i was.

2 co-mingled eggs (i'm sick of the word scrambled). pineapple that was "meh".
and homemade ww crusty bread with a smear of peanut butter.

10:00. green monster smoothie time. and more coffee...

spinach. protein powder. almond milk and ice.
on slurp #4 i got a hunk of spinach that made me gag.
my vitamix has never before failed me on such a level as this.

1:00. lunch. i'm really getting better at the wrap technique. i managed to get more veggies in there this time without it pooping all over the plate while i ate it.

turkey. 1/2 an avocado smashed. spinach. dijon mustard.
freggies on the side because!

3:00. snack time! goodbye m&m o'clock. hello real food o'clock!

anchovies on my desk! just kidding.
celery boats with a greek yogurt/peanut butter mixture and sliced medjool dates on top.

5:00. barely making it through the day, people. almost fell asleep on the buszzzzzzzzzz...

7:00. dinner. the badger cooked tonight and it was pretty good. he cooked up some chicken sausage and made a salad. i made what i believe to be "21 day fix approved" stewed apples - chopped up two apples (thanks badger), cinnamon and nutmeg, water. boil. then simmer. then shut up and put them in your mouth.

sh*tty food picture! you're welcome!

i have to admit that i did not get in a workout today. asides from walking to and from the bus, i did nothing. i missed that alarm this morning and slept, and tonight i'm just too tired. i'm going to listen to my body and try to get a good night's sleep tonight because i desperately need it. i think levi's whole "i'm gonna sh*t on the carpet if you don't let me outside right now at 2am!" is over; he's happily snoozing on the floor next to me, not panting and whining like he has been the past few days.

so. it's 8:20 and i'm heading to bed shortly because i like to party. i'm gonna get up and hit some burpees in the morning. that should be fun. and our weekend coming up is kid-free. i am running saturday morning with a friend and then going to the minnesota state fair (read: deep fried food everywhere and cheese-omg-CHEESE!). i plan to eat the food that is there, but just a whole lot less of whatever i get. i figure if the badger and i can share one of whatever we get, we'll save money and calories! double-win! not sure he's on board with this plan. he may want his own bucket of deep fried cheese...

until tomorrow,
ashley "if you can put it on a stick and deep fry it, they'll eat it" rebekah


  1. are you going to the Bob Mould concert with him? have a great weekend. Naughty Levi. But he's cute. That's worth SOMETHING, is it not?


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