holy shit. march 27th. march 27th was the last time i wrote anything on here. what the f*ck have i been up to? and/or what is wrong with me? there are no excuses for this behavior.
and so. for all the bad choices i have made or the events that have been involuntarily thrust upon me, i will attempt to sum up in a bullet point list, because let's face it - bullets are way more fun. here we go.
· march: i ran the get lucky 7k race in minneapolis. this was my first, and to date, last race of 2012 2013 (f*ck. i don't even know what year it is). my goal was to get through the year injury free. that hasn't happened. but maybe i'm jumping ahead...
· april: i kept running. my knee was definitely starting to scream, but i ignored it and kept running.
· may: i kept running, but couldn't go as far or as fast as i wanted to because of the knee. this made me sad, so i started to recreationally drink, but i wouldn’t say to excess... just yet. in addition, i decided to throw in some biking and swimming which went pretty well and didn't hurt my knee at all, so hot damn, let's keep this up! i also turned 35. i'm now 2 years older than jesus was. i don't know why that's significant at all.
· june: summer is here, summer is here! let's drink beer, let's drink beer! funny. my beer drinking is inversely proportionate to my motivation to do, absolutely, anything. i will show you in a graph because graphs are almost as fun as bullets... note that i said almost as fun.
· july: we took a family road trip through canada to vermont and back. it was a blast. by this point in time, i couldn’t run at all due to my knee. i brought running clothes with me in hopes of a healing miracle so that i could run through the green mountains of vermont, carefree and all that crap. but said miracle never happened and i never even took them out of my suitcase. i actually felt mad at my running clothes – “how dare you take up room in this suitcase? i could’ve packed a bottle of vodka in the space you are taking up, you worthless and pointless wicking material!!!”
- sub-bullet july: what else happened in july? hmm, oh yes. my husband, the badger, went to a concert, fell and hit his head, suffered a brain hemorrhage and was in the hospital for 5 days. the events that followed involved an expensive one-way-ticket for my mom to fly to minneapolis to help me with the house and the twins and the dogs and oh.my.god.everything, endless doctor's appointments and therapy sessions, lots of missed work and, yup, you guessed it - lots more drinking.
· august: my parents full-on moved in with us to help the household keep going while i worked and while the badger slept and went to more doctor and therapy appointments than you can count. remember what i said about drinking in excess? yeah. we’ll just go ahead and call this excessive now.
- sub-bullet end of august: i made the mistake (or wise decision) to get on a scale because i noticed that my clothes didn’t really fit anymore. hey ladies? the dryer really doesn’t shrink your clothes at all, so stop blaming it. sure enough, i was now up 20 lbs from the spring and succeeded in undoing all the hard work i did circa 2011/2012 to lose the baby-mama-flab. <insert the f-word here on my behalf as many times as you’d like to>
it is now september and things are starting to turn around. and thank the good lord because i seriously don’t know how much more i can take. the badger is healing and getting more into his routine as the stay-at-home dad. he still can’t drive or watch the kids on his own due to some memory and vision loss, but he’s on a gradual uphill to a full recovery. the twins have started preschool, which is a separate story all on its own. and simultaneously, i’ve started meeting with a personal trainer to get my ass in gear, figure out this knee problem once and for all and get back to my fighting weight. turns out that the gigantic babies i birthed may have more to do with my knee problem than anything else. because single leg squats? dead lifts? hamstring curls? no problem. my legs are strong. but ask me to do a plank and i pretty much just lay on the floor on my tummy-from-hell until someone comes to pick me up. i’ve had about 6 sessions with my trainer so far, and she told me to get out and run last saturday. so i did. and it was good.
it was very, very good.
how much more can you take? You found out, dear, this evening. That's how much more. sigh. your mom.
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