i married ron swanson

somewhere between being a vegetarian and craving meatloaf is where the badger and i swing quite frequently. when i met him, he was in the best shape of his life, and a 98% vegan. at the time of our courtship, i had dabbled in being a vegetarian with vegan tendencies, so i enjoyed our early days together as we learned to cook and eat vegetarian and vegan together. but in the years since we've met, i've gone back to some of my 'roots', per say, when it comes to cooking. nothing can worm your way into a man's heart like a bacon-wrapped meatloaf, especially when that man is a wisconsin boy raised on meat and potatoes.

grand theft auto is not just a video game...

it is a police event that culminates in your backyard.

but i digress, let’s start from the very beginning. a very good place to start…

whoops, i did it again.

will that song ever not be awesome?

moving on, what exactly is it that i "whoops" did again?

i signed up for another half marathon.

a half marathon recap of sorts

i did it. i actually did it! i ran my first half marathon this morning. my time was 2:10:37.

i had set some unrealistic goals for myself, to the tune of "finish in under 2:00!", which was a tad impractical given that this was my first distance race. but when i got to the start line this morning, i was just giddy with excitement. i had trained my ass off, and this was my day. no expectation or missed goal was going to rob me of this, my first half marathon. so my goals changed as i crossed over that start line. i decided to enjoy the run, high-five the spectators, rock out to my awesome playlist, keep consistent with my speed, and keep a smile on my face as much as i could.

totally freaking the f*ck out (or, my first half marathon is in four days...)

my first half-marathon is this saturday. last night, after a 30-minute-pity-party about how much i've fallen off the running wagon these past two weeks, my mother said to me "well, you've got some cramming to do this week then!"

i know that she means well and that my endeavor to run 13.1 miles is quite a foreign thing to her. but the thing is, you can't really cram for a half-marathon in the last week. i don't know much about racing, but i know that. with only four days to go, if i'm not ready now, there's not much that can be done.

ten, ten, ten, ten, everything, everything, everything, everything!

if you understand the reference in the title to this post, then you most likely graduated high school sometime between 1994 and 1997 and therefore should rejoice in being a part of the most amazing generation ever.

this past saturday morning, i tackled my first double-digit (or, what i shall herein refer to as 'double-deuce') mileage in preparation for my debut half-marathon on april 28th. the farther i journey down this rabbit hole of long(er) distance running, the more i realize that i have no idea what i am doing. i have read endless articles on training plans, injury avoidance, blog posts on hydration and fueling for longer runs and, of course, subscribed to runner's world... which apparently is a requirement if you are to become a 'real' runner. you must have a collection of back issues of runner's world and when you find yourself in a conversation with another runner who references "that article on shin splints from the october 2004 issue of runner's world", you must immediately acknowledge that you not only have read the article, but have it framed in your bedroom.

i quit.

don't panic. i know it's been a while since i've posted, and i'm sure that you've missed me, thought about me constantly, and you're probably thinking right now that "i quit" means that i'm quitting my blog.

but i'm not.

i am quitting quit weight watchers.

weight watchers, beer and chowder.

so. i joined weight watchers.

i know, right?

after almost a year of trying to lose weight, i faced the music a few weeks ago and realized that i may be one of those people who needs an external force to help me out. now that the twins are two, i technically can't get away with calling this 'baby weight' anymore. and although getting back into running this past year has helped, i've only lost about 15 pounds so far. there's another 15 that i need to get rid of in order to not be considered 'overweight' by those infuriating BMI charts, and i'd love to squeeze my ass into some size 8 or 6 jeans by summer.